AAAHHHHHH

I woke up from a bad dream that Barry was cheating on me. He said I have nothing to worry about and I know I don't but it was very upsetting. The other night I had a dream that I was pregnant again. I feel like I'm not sleeping well these days because I'm having such bizarre dreams and it seems like they go all night and I can't get a good rest in. I don't know if this is normal but it sure is annoying.

Today is the day! Barry is going to put the baby furniture together!! I'm so excited. I can finally set up the nursery. Feel free to call him and harrass him for taking so long to do it (970-690-2880).

We are having friends over on Monday...which means that I have to start cleaning now. HAHA. It seems I have no time to get anything done and I'm running in circles these days. At least I make time for myself: 1. I shower, get dressed, do my hair and make-up on a daily basis. 2. I try to eat when I'm hungry (which is usually when Adrian is hungry). 3. I go to my mom's group on thursdays. 5. I try to keep up on blogging and my online photo albums. I even went to the library and borrowed some books in hope that I will find time to read: my favorite hobby.

My best friend has moved to the state and we still haven't seen each other. Maybe one of these days we will.

I also have a long to do list that I'd like to get to including keeping up on the baby book and keeping in touch with my family, exercising daily, and not to mention day to day household stuff. We're all busy right now with both of my cousins pregnant and my aunt and cousin's restaurant just opened up in Estes in May and the rest of my family so far away and also busy with their own lives.

Do I sound overwhelmed? That's how I feel right now! Despite all of this I don't have any problem putting it out of my mind when I stare into my beautiful baby's face and he smiles back at me as if to say that none of it matters so much as long as he's loved and taken care of. And he is.

My little boy is growing out of his 0-3 month clothes and he's only 9 weeks old :( He's growing so fast. He is taking a pacifier now!!! Hurray! I want him to so when he needs to he'll be able to. Also it will keep lots of other things out of his mouth if he uses it. Looks like he'll be a baby that sticks everything in his mouth since he's always sucking on his hands.

Sunday

I have finally finished scheduling all my clients...my saturdays are full (assuming people show up although they sounded hopeful so I shouldn't worry) and my weekday clients are more familiar to me. This job seems so complicated, and it is due to the millions of details. I guess it grows more comfortable. Of course I'm not there yet but I'm at least used to the fact that it is going to take a long time and that I work with people and no two situations or people are the same. Each individual will react to me and affect me differently. Not every situation can be solved the same way even if the problem is the same. I guess I'll never grow bored though!

So Barry and I joined a Sunday dart league. We are slowly starting to regret it since it is our only day together all day. We thought it might be a good thing to have something together but now that we do we can think of a million other things that we want to do this summer also. Barry wants to drop out. I like going but.....other things are good too. I think the timing is not good for me. I thought it was at 11am when I first heard about it but it is at 3:30p and ugh...leaves barely enough time to do anything beforehand and afterwards Barry can't go far b/c he has work the next day.

Anyways...Happy Belated 4th of July!!!

Long Time...

So wow! I haven't written in awhile. Sorry peoples!

All is well and busy. Work is getting more routine now even though I can't totally forget any stress from work and it tends to come out in my dreams and I don't sleep as well. Adrian does ok with the bottle, especially if he's pretty hungry. :( I wish I didn't have to work because he's still so little. I do enjoy my job though.

Grandma LaLa, my mother in law, has moved to Fort Collins. She's so happy to have met Adrian. Of course she's alreading passing on her wisdom to us. Adrian loves her already and just smiles and coos to her. She's a cow collecting fanatic, so of course Adrian's collection of cows has already grown by 2. I'm excited she's here and I'm sure she'll be a great support for us. She only lives about a mile away; although she doesn't drive she does have a bicycle.

Julie took me to get a birthday pedicure today!!! Then we vacuumed out our cars. Went to mom's group today. Brought my friend Molly who has a 6 week old. I think she had fun!

Tomorrow is my cousin Lauren's b-day! Must remember to call her! I totally forgot to babysit for someone the other day (although we hadn't confirmed) and then the next morning I forgot an appointment I had. My mind is a little over run right now. I have to write EVERYTHING down if it's going to get done and even then I forget where I wrote it. I hope this forgetfullness goes away soon.

Barry's working really late tonight to get a van done...I'm going to bring him dinner now.

Little Adrian in his High Chair while we eat dinner! Check out those little ears!!! So Cute!

TUMMY TIME!!!! GO BABY GO!

ALL SMILES!!!

To A Movie With A Baby

My birthday was on Sunday! I had a wonderful day! Adrian must have known because ALL day every time I looked at him, he smiled big happy smiles to me!!! That alone made my day BUT then I also got to go to the pool with my friends Molly and Laurie and their kiddos. Then I went to play on my dart league with Barry and he SUrpRiSed me with a cAkE and everyone sang to me!!!! YUUMMYY! Then I went to see 'Sex and the City' with Barry and the baby. He slept right through it after a tiny fuss at the beginning and a little one in the middle. He also woke up to eat once. Barry calmed him down and held him most of the time. I really enjoyed the movie. I can't believe how sad it was but it was also funny. The only other things I want are a wallet (which I can get with money from my aunt!!!, a pedicure(which Julie is actually getting for me :)) and for Barry to set up the baby furniture and finish my nursing foot stool he's making for me.

So my job is going well. I'm getting cases set up nicely and I actually did my first transport and visit yesterday. I have two cases set up and a third in the process. Two others are not needing me so I am waiting to get more for my Saturdays. Until then I am making up hours during the week. I so appreciate everyone who is helping me out by watching Adrian while Barry and I work!!! (Julie and Molly)

Adrian is amazing!! He's getting so big and he smiles at me and his dad everyday and sometimes just when he's talking to himself and looking out the windows. He's starting to suck on his hand which is great for him in terms of recognizing his hands are in his control but also that he can self soothe when upset....not that that happens too often for our mellow mannered fellow. He's also doing great holding his head up especially considering he's got his dad's big old head, must be a big old brain in there I tell him. He doesn't mind 'tummy time' either and tries really hard to keep his head up and to move it from side to side. Barry has so much fun with him when I have to work and they stay home and play. He hasn't had a full Saturday since I'm not set up on my cases yet but soon enough they'll get a whole day to play.

Oh...funny story...I woke up a couple nights ago to Adrian squirming which means he's waking up to eat...I can feed him laying down sleeping so I just plop him next to me and he eats and falls asleep. I then woke up a little while later...or so I thought...It had been 2 HOURS! and he was eating again!!! He's a self sufficient little baby! No wonder he's growing so much!

And a picture: (last wed june 18)

1st Day Back to Work

I had to go back to work today. I missed my baby all day...but he was in good hands. My cousin, Julie, watched him. She has lots of experience with babies and is actually going to have one of her own. They just moved to be closer to me...I was the only reason...just kidding...Chris, her b.friend, works here and they both go to school here also.














<---Cavyn and Julie




<----Chris, Cavyn and Julie













He just slept all day I guess and woke twice for a bottle. He did great the first time but the second time he had to be convinced that the bottle was his only option. Poor baby. I held him for 2 hours...I actually just put him in his daddy's arms since I got home. Barry got home at 5ish and hung out with Mr. Adrian till I got home at 8:30. I guess he woke at 7:30 and was able to wait to eat until I got home.

What a drag it is to pump at work! First of all, I had to find a private place to pump and secondly I had to find times to pump. I was able to pump 3 times but considering that I am quickly filling my schedule with my caseload, it may become harder to find time. Adrian is still so young that he still eats every 2 to 4 hours and hence I assume I should be pumping as much. My boss is out of town and let me use her office today. I found out that there are two bathrooms available with chairs and outlets that other girls use...but seriously...with all the benefits the county has and all the young mothers that work for the county, there should be a special room available. I know PVH has an awesome one. Maybe I should take my breaks and use theirs...hahaha.

Long day from 11-8. My boss called and woke me up this morning at 8:30am. I was so groggy and now I'm so tired. I really should put myself on a schedule to wake up earlier and go to bed earlier. I got quite a bit accomplished at least.

My job title is Life Skills Case Aide. I assist families and children already involved in the dept of human services via child protective services. I work with families who are voluntarily and court ordered to services. I assist with visitations between parents who are hoping to retain custody of their children or life skills meetings with parents hoping to keep their children in their custody. I am also the soon to be coordinator for the children's group that meets while their parents are in parenting class. That is my job and since I am only part time, most of my work will be done at the department...but generally a lot of travel and transportation tends to be part of the job. Larimer county is huge and we cover the entire county out of Fort Collins.

Adrian has a routine...actually he's always had one though it changes.

Now he stays awake and eats all day every other day...on the off day, he sleeps all day. He does well during the nights and usually only gets up to eat once or twice. Last night I went to bed at 11:30 and he woke up at 4:30. Then again, he may have gotten up at 2:30ish but I don't remember if he did or not. The night runs together...but I know he always gets up at 4:30 and again when Barry gets up at 6:30 and then usually around 9:30. I have no idea what his daytime routine is since I just feed him when he's hungry.


This morning he was smiling at me; it looks like he's laughing sometimes but no sound comes out.


He was cooing in his bouncy chair while I took a shower. I just fed him and laid him down to take a nap since he's crabby...on the days he stays awake all day he does better to fall asleep on his own since any disturbance will wake him. On the days he sleeps all day, anywhere and anyhow he just sleeps.
<----

Bathtime...his hair is so curly when he gets out of the bath. He took a shower with his dad yesterday and just licked at the water when his dad put his whole body and face under the shower! He loves the water!

For Father's day, we made dad a card! We're going to eat our father's day dinner tonight since dad went to a CCR concert last night.
When Dad holds Adrian or is anywhere nearby, Adrian just stares at him. Barry gets his attention every time.

Yesterday I started weeding my garden...it's a process...I probably got only 1/8 of it done. By the time I finish I'll have to start over. Fine with me.

I have to go back to work tomorrow. I'm still stressing about it. Probably will until I get used to it. I have to manage pumping too which is also stressful. I want to take my lunch time to feed him but I live so far from work.

Anyways, better get work done while baby is sleeping!

6 Weeks 2 Days Old

YAY! I have high speed internet! and we have Direct TV too! We're feeling spoiled over here in our big fancy house with all the amenities possible! A little hard to believe still but very enjoyable!

Barry's mom, Adrian's grandmother, is hoping to be out here by the end of the month! Planning is in action!


I have to go back to work on Tuesday and frankly, I'm freaking out about it. I'm planning on a panic attack, and at least crying as I drive to work...and it's a long drive so I've got lots of thinking time. :( It's not that I don't trust him with others, but what if he needs me? What if he doesn't want his bottle? What if we didn't practice the bottle enough? What if he misses me and just wants his mommy? What if I miss him? What if its hard to trust anyone with my angel baby? I hope this gets easier. I have no idea how mom's who have to work full time do it? Not the moms who get off at a good hour or have the dads that can stay home but the couples that both work from 8-5 and their kids are in childcare from 7:30-6p? How on earth do they justify spending so many lost hours away from their children especially at such young ages? As they get older they want to spend time with others but early on, all they want is their mommy and daddy. I don't think I could ever understand. I don't think they're bad parents or anything I just don't understand. I think I'd sacrifice a lot to spend more time with my baby. I'm glad I have such a great schedule since I have to work. I will be working Tuesdays from 11-8p, Wednesdays from 4-8p, and Saturdays from 8-5p. Julie will watch him Tue, Molly on Wed till B gets home, and he'll have Daddy alone time on Sat.


Barry and I joined a dart league. This is the first time we've been able to be on each other's team. He's so much better and we lost last time. He'll just have to get used to me not playing as well as he does since I've taken at least a couple years off and I'm so out of practice. We took Adrian with us last time. We'll probably just take him with us usually. It's only an hour-ish.

Tomorrow's Barry's 1st Father's Day!!! I bought some yummy steaks and lots of fixins for a delicious salad...probably make some rosemary potatoes and onions also. I ordered a collage mug for him with pics of him and his baby son but since I ordered it today it won't be here till mid-week.

I've used cloth diapers for today! So far they've held up okay.

Anyways...now that I've got internet I should be keeping up with happenings and baby news more consistently.

Adrian is now 6 weeks old. I can hardly believe how big he's getting. He's starting to smile so much more these days...especially at 4:30am!! What a cutie though. He sleeps really well still but has been staying awake more during the day!




I LOVE this Picture!!















Today while hanging with Uncle Judah and Mom! Check out the wild hair...it just keeps getting longer. We might let it grow till he's one...we'll have to see how cute it stays.

Almost 6 Weeks....2 more days....

This morning I took my brother in law, Bobby, to Ramblewood Apts. to fill out an application for his mom, my mother in law, Adrian's Grandmother!!! so that she can move out here! She's hoping to be on her way on the 27th!
I went to Habitat for Humanity today to check out the furniture situation. I was specifically looking for a king sz bed frame, and maybe a dk wood end table for my living room. No luck on the bed frame BUT...I did get a great deal on a cool couch. I love it...you may say that it belongs in your grandmother's living room but I absolutely love it...so I bought it. It was originally $50 but I got it for $25....light to carry and in perfect shape except for one slit on the bottom of one seat cushion cover! I also got two end tables originally marked at $20 each for $25 total!!!! And best of all....our old neighbors/friends from across the street on Cragmore weren't working, have a truck, AND were willing to come help me move them in to my house!!! Thanks to Patrick and Robert!
Thankfully Adrian is back on his normal sleep schedule of sleeping almost all day! Yesterday he decided he was a big boy and didn't need to sleep anymore...omg...all at once too. I didn't really get anything done. However, staying up all day must have worn him out and he slept all night long. I think he woke twice to eat as usual but he didn't hang out and talk to himself like he sometimes does. And today he was up for a little while this morning hanging out with me but other than that he slept all day!
Yay! We have our DirectTV set up now! I guess that means I have internet at home too...I haven't investigated that yet though.
Very very soon I will post pictures...also if I haven't sent you the snapfish Adrian group room link or if you can't access it let me know.
Goodnight!

5 Weeks Old

We are slowly getting settled into our new home. We purchased a table for the kitchen! I will have to post pictures when we get internet set up at our house. We're finally getting high speed internet and dish tv. Barry's excited about the tv and I'm excited about the internet. YAY!

I will have to go back to work on the 17th. My cousin, Julie, will watch Adrian at our house for us(and I'll watch her Cavyn when he comes along) until Barry comes home. Then on Wednesdays, Molly will watch him until Barry gets off of work. On Saturdays, Barry and Adrian will hang out.

Adrian is doing great! He still has a dry nose and he screams when I use the booger snatcher. He tracks movement really well. He sleeps well through the night. I didn't wake up until 4:30 last night after going to bed at 11:30 (unless I got up without remembering of course...yes...I tend to not remember when or how many times I get up.) He is making cute noises these days and smiling more! He can lift his head really well, even from laying down on his tummy. He loves to look around. He's so mellow and still rarely cries! Hooray!

New Address

We have officially moved...our new address is 2112 Romney Avenue Fort Collins, CO 80526. We have turned off our home phone line (493-0317) so call our cell phones if you need to reach us.
All else is well. Will write more when we have a computer set up.

26 Days Old

<----Our Sweet Baby!

Our poor baby has a stuffy nose...I hate putting saline drops in his nose and using the aspirator. He screams at me. Other than that he is doing great. He's definitely getting more vocal...although crying is still at an extreme minimum. He coos and gurgles some, awake and asleep. He was pretty grumpy this morning which isn't normal either. I gave him a bath and now he's happily sleeping in the Baby Bjorn. He's doing great sleeping in his little co-sleeper still as well as his basinet during the day. He's a big eater...usually every 2 hours. He'll usually go for at least one 4 hour stretch of sleep without eating a day/night.

Last night we had our first post-partum class...we shared birth stories. It seems that I had the experience closest to my birth plan. It's amazing how much can happen that you don't plan for. I'm just thankful I didn't have to have anything I didn't want (except for stitches...but they're all worth it.) Of course I forgot we had class and another dad called Barry and then I remembered I didn't call the teacher or check my spam mailbox for her email and by then Barry was all set to finally relax and watch Cloverfield after a long day of moving in the rain. I dragged him...he's still sick too. It was awesome to see all the babies. They're all about the same size and age...ranging from April into May. Of course Adrian had the most hair! Funny thing is that all the babies look like their dads...our teacher said that is generally the norm but that as they get older they look like their moms too.

We're moving! It's a slow tedious wet and rainy process. We have lots of stuff...but the house is completely empty. It's so much bigger than what we have now and I have a lot of stuff that does not need to be unpacked...i.e. I'm a packrat. We aren't taking our kitchen table which means we need to find another one. Also we need a bed frame, new dressers-one is broken, a new couch &/or lazyboys, and a nice computer desk. The house is still so empty right now. We have 2 chairs, a piano, an old couch, a dresser, a mattress, and some random book shelves...I would like to update past "college furniture" as Barry puts it. Anyways...we have until the 1st to be out of the old place so I'm taking it easy...I think I overdid it a couple days ago.

20 Days Old

My best friend from MD came to visit with her son!!! She hung out with us for a couple days.I'm glad she got to see Adrian while he is an infant. We went to Estes to see her family. I got my hair cut at my cousin's shop while we were up there too!


Barry's sister came out to visit! That was fun...She took us shopping and bought some cute baby clothes...talk about the best dressed baby of the world! We took her to Estes! Finally got to see my Aunt and cousin's new restaurant: the Riverside Cafe! And we went to a Rockies' game last night...baby's first baseball game! He slept right through it all except to wake up and eat every hour. Aunt Veronica had to leave today though.


Adrian is doing great...he now fits into more of his 0-3 month clothes which means he must be growing. Last Thursday he was up to 8 lbs 2.5 oz. I'm sure he's bigger now. He basically has his schedule that he sticks to pretty consistently: I get to bed between 10 and 11 and he wakes up to eat around 1:30 and again around 4:30 and then in the morning at 6:30, 8:30, and 10:30. I shower while he sits in his bouncy chair and listens to a Raffi CD or other kid music and looks around (that's what infants do) . Then I eat and he eats again and then by 12 or 1 he goes back to sleep for the rest of the day unless he's hungry which he wakes up for. Sometimes in the evening he's up for an hour or so besides eating just to hang out. He's still so mellow. Right now we all have stuffy noses probably from allergies. It's so sad when I have to use the nose aspirator to pull his boogers out...he cries...but he can breath afterwards at least. He poops ON me daily...I just don't think he ever stops so I guess there's no good time to change him when I'd be safe. He's always moving, especially his hands. He barely ever cries and when he does it's usually just a baby dinosaur wail (like the raptor that hatches in Jurassic Park). He's so alert too! He doesn't like his binky and rarely takes it...nobody's tricking him with a fake! He smiles so much, right after he's eaten and getting ready to nod off! It's the cutest thing ever...sometimes it looks like he's laughing but no sound comes out. Same with crying. He coos once in awhile and he makes little squeaks and sighs when he sleeps. He's so precious!

I started moving things today with Bobby and his friend's assistance and truck!!! They are helping me with moving all week since Barry is working. Then Barry will get his friends and brother to help with the big stuff on this weekend and the next! HORRAY!!! We're gonna move!

15 Days Old

Adrian is doing great! He sleeps A LOT! Actually he's been staying up for longer periods occasionally but he still sleeps more than some other infants I've known. He's a great sleeper though and he'll sleep through anything. He most loves to sleep in someone's arms but he also does great in his little co-sleeper bed that fits into our bed or his bassinet that rocks.

He's doing great with breastfeeding, so am I. A little sore at first but that's normal I guess. I think my stitches are healing pretty well. I've been more able to do things around the house. I've also been getting out a lot. I can't stand being home all day. We've been shopping, to visit my work, to visit dad at work, to Estes with my best friend who came to visit, and today we are going to the doctor. I don't really want to go but I think it's too late to cancel the appointment and I do want to know how much he weighs now. I think he looks bigger every day.

My New Love

Update

Hospital stay was 2 nights b/c we had to stay for 30 hours...so Adrian could get his bilirubin test (jaundice screening). The nurses were great in helping with breastfeeding and any other information we wanted. It was nice getting all the attention in the world, my vitals were checked every couple hours, food was brought up to me, if I needed anything all I had to do was push a button. It was awesome (no I didn't abuse the button but I've never been in a hospital before.)

We took Adrian to the lactation consultant the other day and he had gained back 2.5 oz of the 4 he lost....they usually lose weight after birth....and yesterday at the doctor's visit...he had gained back all 4 oz...he was exactly his birth weight at 6 days! It's normal to gain back the weight in 10-14 days! He's a good eater. He's also a great little sleeper and he doesn't startle at anything! He passed his hearing screening at the hospital, his jaundice levels were 5.3 (I guess they worry as the level nears 10).
He smiles in his sleep, sometimes it looks like he's laughing but no sound comes out. Yesterday he cooed for the first time...and he sighs like I do (actually Barry and I both sigh a lot). We're so in love with him....it's the most amazing thing we've ever done...and I think we're still surprised everyday by how perfect he is. I'm so happy Barry took off this entire week!!!! He saved his vacation time and used a couple sick days for the 1st and 2nd last week also. We're all going to be sad when he has to go back to work on Monday :( He's been so amazing and confident! Also my parents have been amazing! They are here until Tuesday: they've cleaned the house and cooked for us and let us nap. I'm so glad Adrian came a couple weeks early...they've had more time to spend with him. I don't want them to leave :( Barry's sister is coming out from the 17th until the 21st!!! Yay...Aunt Ronnie! I think it's amazing how much help everyone has given us with Adrian! I appreciate all my cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and friends who've brought us food, support and company!!! Thank you all! I love having people over by the way...and if I need a nap, everyone is more than happy to hold a sleeping baby and I'm more than happy to let them!

I wish I had more pics to post BUT our camera decided to stop working the day after he was born! At least our warranty was still good for another month! I've been using my dad's camera but we still have no way of transporting the pics to my computer (I think my cousin has a card reader so hopefully soon I'll post pics).

Baby Adrian Picture

New Daddy!

Adrian's Finally Here!!

I can't believe my baby is here! I love him sooooo much! This really is my biggest dream come true!

He's a sweet baby, very peaceful and quiet. He's a healthy baby, no problems whatsoever from the moment he was born! I'm holding him in my arms right now as I type.

So on May 1st I woke up at 6:30 to Barry's alarm. I had work at 8 and needed to find out where my training was to be held. As I rested on my hands and knees trying to keep Adrian's weight off my back which had been hurting terribly all night and waited for the shower, I felt a POP! I thought 'No Way...it doesn't actually feel like a pop!' but nevertheless, hurried off the bed just in case. Then I leaked my way into the bathroom and told Barry that I think my water just broke. He said ...hahaha....'no you just peed your pants'....hahaha. Then it kept happening! I called the nurse line since the doc was closed. They said to go the hospital and check in. So I took a shower, Barry started to pack the hospital bag and walk around in dazed circles saying 'I am calm' but he was so disoriented, then I got dressed, Barry walked in more 'calm circles'. An hour later, we were packed in the car and on the way to the hospital. I was feeling the contractions more than the nights before now.
We checked in to the third floor at the hospital and set up camp in our room! YAY...we got a room with a jacuzzi tub! My cousins, Julie and Christie showed up with flowers, video cameras, McDonalds, donuts, fruit, juice, and lunch fixins' for later! My parents showed up after them! (They got into town from Maui the day before and when they came for dinner couldn't believe I was in labor and so close!)
After eating breakfast and sharing my birth plan with everyone that walked in the room and meeting my doctor and nurse, we just hung out. The contractions felt stronger and Barry encouraged me to drink lots of water! Eventually I spaced out and just rode with each contraction and I don't know how so much time passed from when we got there till 2p but around 2ish the doctor checked my progress, I was only 2 cm! She strongly encouraged me to get moving so that I wouldn't have to be induced. She said that because my water broke so early, the risk of infection would drive them to induce me with pitocin. I said there was no way they were giving me pitocin. She didn't argue but she told my cousins and parents that they needed me to move...now! They basically made me get out of bed and marched me around the birthing center and women's care unit! The nurses at the desk kept asking if I needed at wheel chair in womens' care but my cousins practically shouted 'no! doctor's orders are that she moves'! Then when I got back I got into the jacuzzi tub! The contractions got really strong then and after being in the tub for awhile they checked me again and I was at 5 cm. From there the contractions were flying by and lasting 2 minutes. When Barry told me that, I couldn't believe that they were actually lasting that long! But they sure were the most intense cramps I've ever felt! and ever since being in the jacuzzi bath, I'd been having back labor! FUN!!
It was hard to leave the bath but Barry was getting restless hanging out in the bathroom for hours and I probably needed a change of scenery as the contractions were getting serious and coming so close together! When I repositioned on the bed hanging over the back of the bed (those hospital beds can be repositioned in about 20 different ways), I rode the strongest contractions yet! Then suddenly I felt like pushing...I didn't say anything for the first two times since I was not sure if that was what I was really feeling but then I said that. Everyone was surprised since I was only at 5 cm when I got out of the tub. Barry called the nurse and the nurse called the doctor and checked me. I was at 9 CM!!!! Hurray...almost there! Then a few contractions later, the nurse said to push when I felt like it. I tried. It was hard and a little scary being so close to get into the rhythm of pushing. They wanted me to hold my breath while I pushed and I had not imagined that I would do that...I thought I should breath so that was also hard but when I did it their way, it worked better since there was more power. After repositioning into a half laying position so I could control my legs and use more features of the bed to push...I finally got into the rhythm of it. They brought a mirror out so I could see also. OMG...seeing his head for the first time made me think...'it's littler than I thought but also... no way that is coming out'. After pushing for about an hour, amidst a crowd of at least four doctors and my nurse, the baby's nurse, the hospital's on call pediatrician, and who knows who else, Adrian was born!
He came out like superman, hand first! I tore pretty badly and needed 3 packages of stitches, an obstetrician specialized in tears to diagnose it as a bad 2nd degree tear. Some of the doctors thought it was a 3rd degree. Whatever the degree, it hurt and still does. It was all worth it though... and it was worth not getting an episiotomy also!
I didn't get any pain medication!!!! Which was my goal. After the bath they did give me sterile water blocks in my back to help with the back labor. They shoot 4 bubbles of water to interfere with the nerve signals to the brain from the back. I'm not sure they worked but they may have since the back labor didn't get tooooooo much worse. Had I not had them, they may have gotten worse...who knows...at the time, I didn't think they worked. I also used the TENS unit in the beginning. I highly recommend it, especially since it distracted me and gave something to focus on during the contractions. After I got out of the bath however, we forgot to put it back on. I wish I had. I was against getting an IV but after discussing with the doctor that it would only be used in an emergency and with my discretion then I agreed to get it put in. We never had to use it. I got to drink and eat lightly the entire time, whenever I felt like it. I was monitored but not overly and they also used a wireless external fetal monitor. Only at one point did they think that the baby's heart rate was too low and it went back up after the next 15 minutes.
My doctors were all so awesome, my nurses were amazing! Everyone was understanding and respectful of what I wanted. I felt in control and most of all I had an amazing partner! I couldn't have done this without Barry! The childbirth classes really paid off and Barry felt in control and empowered to stick up for what I wanted. He did great! Also everyone else that was there helped me out a lot.

I'll write more later about the rest of the hospital stay! I'm just so happy that I had the experience but more importantly that it is now over and the rest of the journey is just beginning!

Almost there...

Went to the doctor:
I'm 1 cm! 80% effaced! The baby is REALLY low! AND last but not least...I'm having contractions every 2 minutes! They're not really intense and I've been having them since last night! Went to work today, then cleaned my house like crazy b/c my parents are here from Maui! They just got in today!

Wait to here more! Hopefully sooner than later!!!

FYI

Click this link:
PVHS Babies

Then Click on Poudre Valley Hospital

Then you can search by 'Family Name' Mother's Last Name: Leili-Biss

Or you can search by Hospital: Fort Collins, CO
Then Poudre Valley Hospital
Then the date

A picture should be posted of the baby!!! I don't know how long it takes to post though.

Today Cont...

So today, Barry and I went on a scavenger hunt for his birthday present! He picked out the GPS he wanted: a Garmin Vista HCX!!! Hurray!!! We're waiting till next friday at REI since they're having a really good package deal sale on it including the case, a topographical U.S. software CD, but not an SD card...still about a $100 cheaper altogether!!! (He was however looking at Walmart and found it even cheaper but REI has a lifetime guarantee on everything so we'll have to weight that out.)

<---37 Weeks

Aaawww!!! How Cute!!!!

<---38 Weeks
Could this child possibly grow anymore?

<----Today!

I think he did get bigger actually! I can't even finish a whole meal...there's nowhere for it to go.

38 Weeks and 2 Days

Holy Cow...I'm such a HEFALUMP! I can't bend over anymore. I can't sleep anymore. It hurts to move, turn, roll, anything....I've been discussing with Adrian the possibility of him coming early...actually encouraging it. I seriously have to pee twice an hour, which is hard when I'm working...I just ask to use clients homes...I don't mind though some caseworkers do...I think it's a good chance to see the rest of the home and I think I have a good enough excuse! So walking is more comfortable than sitting BUT I sit all day at my job...either in the car (drove over a 100 miles yesterday for visits) or at my desk or in trainings. Walking too much hurts my back though...so it's a lose-lose situation at this point. I used to say, "he'll come when he's ready" but now I say "no time like right now!"

Must keep my mind and self occupied till he decides to show up though:
Barry's Birthday (#30) is on Monday!!! I think I'll take him out to get his gift this weekend! It's a GPS!! He has no idea. I kind of need his assistance in picking out the right one that he'll want...and if we do it this weekend then he can use it!!! (http://www.geocaching.com/)
Our friends are coming to Ft. Collins and we'll go out to dinner next week sometime!!!
My parents are coming on Wednesday!!!
I have an doc appointment on Wednesday!!!
I have a cool DV (domestic violence) training on Thursday all day!!!
Of course work on Mon, Tue, Wed, Thur, AND Fri is scheduled should nothing interfere!

Last Wednesday, I was totally effaced and he was 'engaged'! That means I can start dilating at any time and he's in the right position and stuck there!!! hahahaha!

I've got everything else ready to go...almost...still working on packing that bag although there is a pile of stuff in the livingroom and the baby's bag is packed and the carseat is set up in the car. The house is an endless whorlwind of clean clothes and dog fluff! (Yay for shedding season!)

Good news: we've managed to pay of some of our stupid credit card bills!!!! HURRAY!!! Don't use credit cards! Also, we're going to sign our new lease this weekend!!!

Well...Have a good weekend!! Wish happy thoughts for Adrian to come soon!

Baby Shower Picture Catch-Up Blog

So I guess I should post those baby shower pics! I had so much fun and everything was soooo cute! I love my turtle theme! Of course after Barry saw the cake, he hacked off the head and ate it. :( It was so cute, I couldn't watch.

16 Days and Counting...

So I thought I was tired last week...but really I'm tired this week...it's harder to fall asleep now and to stay asleep once I've fallen asleep. Any aches and pains I complained about before weren't as strong as now. The other night was half asleep from 3-5:30 with cramps!!! But I haven't felt any (besides Braxton Hicks) since then.

On Sunday, I set up a baby area in the bedroom. One bookshelf with diaper/bath stuff and books. Another with all the clean clothes: one box of 0-3 month and another with mostly 3 month, a box of socks, and a box of hats! This kid has more hats than Barry and he wears them daily. I washed all the blankets and cloth diapers and swing/chair covers! The swing is set up in the livingroom, which I also rearranged and reboxed all the stuff we won't need till after we move. The car seat is in the car. And I'm ready to go!!! (except for that hospital bag) Can we say 'nesting?'

So the hospital bag deal: If I pack it, I'll need it right? So why not wait till everything at work is settled and then I'll feel better about being ready. Physically I feel ready but there's so much still to do like a phone tree, finding someone to care for the dogs, waiting till my parents get into town (next wednesday), and finishing at least one more week of work.

Doctor visit tomorrow! Hopefully I've progressed a little more. Adrian is still head down as far as I can tell and not able to move as much any more...running out of space. He still kicks and I felt his foot for sure the other day. I was so amazed because it was a perfect outline and so tiny! It was cool! He's been using the space under my ribs to stretch into...which is awefully uncomfortable and just a little painful. Poor guy has no more room.

Work is going well! Still training, lots of observation. I think I'll learn a lot more as I get cases and clients to work with. Still figuring out how the system runs with so many aspects to keep track of. I saw a little baby at work today, a caseworker just had him last week. SOOO tiny! I can't wait!!!!

Our friend is about 3 weeks behind us and they just had a baby shower for little Miles this past Saturday! They had a BBQ at their new house! It was 70+ degrees out and I got a sunburn. I'm so excited we'll have playdates with kids all around the same age! I look so huge compared to her. However, I'm not wearing maternity clothes.

37 Weeks and counting...

Doctor's appointment went well today. I am 50% effaced and the baby is head down! Next appointment is next Wednesday.

Otherwise all is going pretty well. New job and training is keeping me busy. Also still trying to catch up on my to-do-before-baby-comes list: ie. pack hospital bag. Feels like whenever I get one thing done, two more get added to the list. How does that work? Whatever...it'll get done eventually. I'm getting more tired during the days as we get closer to D-Day!

Baby shower was awesome this past sunday! I'll have to write and post pics later since I'm about to pass out from fatigue in two seconds.

36 Weeks and 2 Days...

36 weeks means that next thursday Adrian will be considered a full term baby and could come at any time! I'm freaking out now...nothing is ready...my bags aren't even packed for the hospital. I have no idea how to get ahold of my doctor if I go into labor at nighttime. My parents are coming and my house is a WRECK! We have to move and I have nowhere to put stuff if we start packing. I'm willing to get rid of stuff that Barry still wants and Barry's willing to get rid of stuff I still want...so we have are left with a ton of 'stuff'. I have to work until Adrian comes which leaves me no energy to clean my house when I get home. I'm running out of things that fit me comfortably but even then, everyone tells me I don't look as far along as I am. And ... I can't stand looking at these stupid pink walls anymore. Who coerced us into that idea anyway?? AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the non-freaking out note:
I had fun at my training Thursday and Friday! I learned a lot about interacting and building relationships with families, as well as moderating feelings that might come up in working with tough clients. The hotel bed was rather comfortable...and even though I signed up for a double to share with someone they ran out and I wasn't charged to be put into a single!!! Yay for my own room. Ate lunch at Rocket Johnny's burger joint at the mall, then dinner at Piatti (awesome authentic italian place in Cherry Creek if you're ever there), and lunch on friday at Chez Jose (very good and cheap). Our trainers: Bunny and Cassie were absolutely fun and amazing! They kept us entertained with coloring while we listened, group activities, role playing, and food! They had a wealth of knowledge and experience to share and I look forward to the other two classes in this series.

Looking forward to tomorrow and the baby shower! I have to go clean my house and get ready to babysit tonight.

*** My parents are coming on the 30th not the 20th.

35 Weeks and 6 Days

So I ended up not babysitting for anyone this past weekend....but we had a lovely dinner at my cousins and celebrated Barry, Bobby, and Judah's birthdays! Babysat monday and tuesday, went to a meeting at work yesterday and a benefits meeting today. Yay!! I get benefits!! Dental will only cost about $3/month if I get it. I think that's amazing!

Tomorrow I'm going to a training in Denver for two days (if the incoming storm doesn't close Denver public schools)...they pay for a hotel and food and we'll take a county car. Three of us are going to that and I hear that the trainings are pretty fun so I'm excited!

Except...last night I had some aweful shooting pain in my back and then my hip hurt all night. Today my whole pelvis hurts. Fun Stuff! I hope the beds are comfy at the hotel.

I'm looking forward to the baby shower this sunday also!!!

:) GOOD NEWS!!! I just got an email that my parents are coming out from April 20th to May 13th!!!!

Otherwise all is well and busy as usual. I really need to pack my bags for the hospital soon. Adrian has been moving a lot considering how cramped his space is growing! He was head down last time I was at the doctor and tends to hang out like that for longer periods during the day and night than he did before but he still moves around. Right now he is head down; I can tell because he's got hiccups right now! I can also tell when he's tickling me with his hands or kicking with his feet or knees. He's getting so big. I can't tell if I'm growing bigger but a good indication could be that my clothes are getting tighter and my shirts are getting shorter. Hhhmmmm.....I've gained a total of 28 lbs so far. Not too bad, hopefully I'll lose it just as easily. Childbirth classes last for one more week. Then we wait till after all the babies are born and we meet four more times. Barry and I have a Parent's Preview Tour of Poudre Valley Hospital on the 19th! Anyways...I need to go rest...I feel like I could pass out right here at the computer.

Child Abuse Awareness Month

Adrian got to hear lots of new voices today.....because...
I started my new job today: Life Skills Case Aide. I got to shadow other case aides during visitation between parents and children, set up my computer, email, phone line, check out my desk, get fingerprinted and set up all my paperwork at HR, and meet the rest of my team. I feel like a grown-up with my own desk and phone line! Next week I have a training in Denver, for which I'll spend the night, all hotel and food expenses paid. I feel a little overwhelmed today with all the information but overall the job looks to be exciting and the people I work with are awesome! Lots of incentives for working with the county: paid gas milage, food at all the trainings, county vehicles to use instead of your own car, trainings of all sorts: I'm a dork: I love taking classes and going to trainings.
Anyways, long day...and another tomorrow...Then I babysit Maddie on Saturday and Monica and Daniel on Sunday! Sunday evening we are celebrating Judah's B-day and Christie, Ty, Melissa, and Tom's return from Italy in Longmont! I think I'll go celebrate my bed right now though.

April 2nd

Happy Birthday to Judah!

Last night I went to my friend Molly's and we ordered Chinese food! I'm eating leftovers now :)

Went to the doctor this morning but had the rest of the day off. All is well! Adrian is head down now (although this morning he wasn't until we got to the docs). What a show-off! He sure is wiggly still though. And I can totally feel the extra pressure on my bladder...maybe I should invest in those adult diapers...eeewwww...I don't want to. I got my finger pricked to do the hemoglobin test-I'm not anemic!! She wanted to see me in a week and every week hereafter but she is out of the office Mon thru Wed, and I've got my new job on Th/Fr....so it won't be until week 37 that I see her again.

After the doctor I went to get a new copy of my birth certificate, but I didn't have a check or cash with me so I'll do that tomorrow since I'll be in the area anyway for work. Then when I went to check my car for a checkbook, I locked myself out....thankfully they had a hanger and my window was open half an inch.

Went to the library, shopping, to visit my coworkers and children at the daycare because I miss them, and to get gas-I was below E. Then I came home and made a pan of lasagna for our neighbors who just had a little baby girl!!! I got to hold all 9lbs of her-9 lbs is tiny considering....Then I made a pan of lasagna (gr. beef, spinach, roasted red peppers) for B and I.

OMG-Ronnie sent out my belly! It's here safe and sound. She couldn't resist throwing in a Beattle's guitar rendition of songs that came with a puppet and rattle, some musical instrument bath squirters, 3 new Horton Hears A Who Onesies, and 2 maternity T's for me!!!! Thanks for spoiling us Ronnie! Barry says: "how does she know I love the Beattle's so much?"

So last night I woke up at midnight and it took me 3 hours to fall back to sleep...and all I was doing was worrying about 'what if I go into labor now?' I tried to relax but then I got hungry and had to get up to eat a snack. Then the dogs woke up and wanted out. I also peed about 5 times. Hopefully I"ll get some sleep tonight since I have a full day tomorrow 9-5. So yes...I start my new job tomorrow! I'm nervous but excited!

I've been having crazy dreams lately. I actually saw the baby's face the other night...he had big ears that stuck out, big round brown eyes, cute little mouth and lips and a very distinguished nose. He was cute though. I didn't know he was being born until I felt a tickle on my hip and it was his hand. That was weird. The night before I had a dream that he was under my shirt but he wasn't in my belly anymore...tada...I wish it were that easy!

So since yesterday was April Fool's Day I had to call Barry while he was at the bar watching the Yankees game with a guy he met in our childbirth class. I told him he better come back home now. I was really calm but he freaked out anyway...hahahaha. I didn't lead him on too long, that would be mean. I could have had him come all the way home...ahahahaha..

My Birth Plan: 1st Draft

Welcome to the Birth of Adrian Leili Biss!
Parents: Barry R. Biss and Neshamah D. Leili-Biss
Support Team: Barry Biss and Deborah Leili (please talk with them about anything that needs to be discussed with me-they will communicate between us in between contractions)
Doctor: Dr. Diana Hornung, Salud Clinic

Mother’s Statement: I want a natural, non-intrusive birth experience where my body will be doing the work without any ‘medical’ intervention. I trust my body and my baby’s body and my support team. I welcome your experiences and expertise in this birth. I understand that a birth cannot be ‘planned’ but I want everything and anything that can be done to make this experience as natural and void of intervention as possible. Thank You!

Natural Experience To Me:
No Intervention Means:
No Pitocin!
No Medications!
No Time Limits!
Avoid C-Section by any and all means!
No Rupture of Membranes!
No IV!
No Constant Monitoring! Baby or Self!

Natural Assistance Means:
TRUST ME!
Only periodic Monitoring of Progress…(ask me 1st if I want to know)
Drink (/Eat) as needed! Hydrate Self!
Movement and Position Changes!! Ball! Use Tub/Shower! (Every 30 minutes)
Distractions: Music! Control Temperature and Atmosphere! Massage!
Informed Consent of anything that is done!
Support Team: Barry knows how to help me! Deborah will support him!

Labor
-Visitors (ask me 1st)
-Wear my own choice of clothes
Delivery
-Barry and Deborah Only-No Visitors
-Not back lying
Baby
-Breastfeeding and Rooming In
-All/Any support Welcome
-Visitors Welcome (ask me 1st)

38 Days Left...

The night before last I was half awake and unable to fall asleep b/c Adrian was moving so much when all of a sudden I bolted up in my bed. Adrian was RUNNING, his feet were pounding against the left side of my stomach! I've never felt that before and I was just a little surprised and scared wide awake. I woke Barry and of course after running a marathon, he was taking a break by the time Barry's hand made it to my stomach.

He has been SOOO active lately...they say that with your first child, they should go head down in preparation for birth anywhere between 32 and 36 weeks. Sometimes they wait until labor but usually if it's a second or third birth. I've felt him hang out upside down though, and I wouldn't mind if he waited, even though we might stress about that. I guess right now, he's upside down...terribly uncomfortable and heavy when I stand but better when I sit.

Last night we tried to find the heart beat but all we could hear was his hiccups pounding the microphone. It was pretty funny! Our friends have a dopplar, the kind they use at the doctors. That would probably work better.

I bought a book called 'Belly Button Book' by Sandra Boynton when I was out baby shower shopping! Hilarious! I make Barry read it to us! I love Boynton's books.

Yesterday we went to Estes Park for a friend's baby shower! It was at the Redstone Restaurant (which used to be the P.O. Cafe where I worked when I was a young teen). Very cool little place now! Our friend is from Ireland and we met her working at the YMCA in 2001. She married a guy and they live in CO but plan on moving to WY-closer to us at least, and they're two weeks behind us! They're also having a little boy: Conor! Here is a picture of our babies meeting each other.

Barry's mummy -Grandma Biss-made us some more things for Adrian that I brought back from NJ: 2 blankets and a little baseball outfit: the ribbon has baseballs, and the buttons on the sweater are baseballs! CUTE!!!

34 Weeks, 2 Days

Well here goes 34 weeks! The time is flying by now.
Doesn't the belly look like a tumorous appendage now? Not really part of me anymore...it has a mind of its own...and moves as such. I thought because he was getting bigger and has less room that he would move less but NOOOO he was just taking a break last week because he hasn't stopped moving this week. My aunt told me it would feel like sleeping with a bowling ball on you and it sure does now. Actually not just when I'm sleeping either. And you can tell my face is getting a little chubbier too (or b/c I just woke up from a nap and I'm puffy and yes my hair's a mess).

So I start my new job on Thursday! 20 hours a week...I'll train before the baby comes during the day through April and then go back to work part time evenings/weekends after a month to 6 weeks. I'll work this job Thursdays, Fridays, and Tuesdays for now. I also plan on continuing until the end of April with babysitting Gavin Mondays and Tuesdays, as well as continuing to substitute for the daycare and pick up babysitting hours whenever until the baby comes.

I had my prenatal massage that Barry got me for christmas last week!!! It was 80 minutes of massage bliss and I got to use a pillow that my belly fit into! It was awesome. I have another one I can use anytime. I think I'll save it for after the baby is born and my body needs some relaxing and I need 80 minutes to myself!

Judah's Birthday (#22) is on Wednesday!

Also my doctor's appointment is that morning. I plan on discussing my birth plan and different options with her then...I want the least intervention possible and I know that it is up to the doctor and me to agree on the options. Dr. Hornung has told me that she wants me to have a natural childbirth and whatever I want...I think she'll be on the same page in terms of what I want as long as everything goes smoothly. After taking four of our childbirth classes and watching 'The Business of Being Born' I'm actually excited to give birth. I think the whole process will be amazing! I'm not scared of the pain and I know my body is capable of doing it's job. I was so scared in the second trimester but as it gets closer I'm less and less worried. Barry is also getting so excited and feeling empowered about being able to do all kinds of things to help me and be a part of the whole thing. I think that education and knowledge has been a big help in preparing both of us and increasing our confidence! I highly recommend classes and/or researching all different options despite what you already believe about childbirth. In the very least, you'll be more confident that you want what you think you want and you'll know why.

We are going to Estes tomorrow for a friend's baby shower...their baby boy is due two weeks after ours. I went gift shopping today at Once Upon A Child...they remodeled the entire store...it looks awesome! I love baby shopping! I actually found a couple things for Adrian: 3 kimono snap t-shirts to wear until his umbilical cord falls off so he doesn't have to wear tight onesies for $2.50, and 2 sleep nightgowns for easier nighttime access to the diaper for $2.50. Not a bad deal at all and warranted purchases since I didn't register for either!

Here's a picture of my cousin, Julie, and I on Easter Sunday! She's 14 weeks and I'm 33.

More Pictures...33 Weeks

He's getting so big that his movements aren't as big but they sure are getting stronger!!! I guess his bones are also hardening so I can feel that as he digs into my hips and sides...hehe...he's showing off how strong he is.

Oh...good news...our childbirth class this monday is moved back to monday from tuesday...they had changed it which was dissapointing b/c Barry has dart night on Tuesday. I was going to go all by myself..but now I don't have too!!! :) Yay! OH...one of the couples had their baby 4 weeks early! A little girl, Starlett...isn't that a cute name?

Weekend Finally...

Wow...I got back so late on Wednesday and I feel like I've been working nonstop since then. Last night Barry and I both fell asleep at 5:30pm and slept straight through till morning! (Well I got up half a dozen times to pee...but that's as good as it gets anymore.) I feel like I could do that all over again tonight too. Had some bizarre dreams ...woke up crying from one because I saw our dead friends' mom (she lost 2 sons) in the dream and she made me cry she was so sad. Then another, all my family and Barry's family and our friends from out east were at this crazy party in a warehouse. Everyone was drinking and playing games and it was kind of like a concert or rave. I woke up mad at Barry and demanding he buy me a new car since he ruined my beloved Subaru...hahaha. (Maybe I shouldn't sleep so much).

So as long as my background check goes through...I've got a new job!! Case Aide position in the Larimer Dept. of Human Services...Child Protection. YAY!! Part time 20 evening/weekend hours per week, with part time benefits. I can take 4-6 weeks off with the baby, and train beforehand through April!!!! (Stressful but good).

Lopsided Baby: Adrian has always liked to hang out on the right side...sometimes more so than others.

Belly Cast: We'll get to sand it down and paint it! Dee, the woman who cast my belly said that 32 weeks is the perfect time to do it. Ronnie just called and said she is sending it soon...she found two more shirts for me too!!! I'm so spoiled!

Back Home

It was so good to see my (and Barry's) family and my friends, Jeff and Alana! Ronnie, Barry's sister, spoiled me with a belly casting!!! at the spa in her shop (Destination Maternity which has Motherhood Maternity, Mimi's Maternity, A Pea In the Pod). She also got me some cute t-shirts and Barry a new Yankee's hat. I went through my grandmother's hand painted oriental dish collection and picked out a dark blue dragon tea set!!! also a 20's chandelier green ornate fruit? bowl. Very cool! I shipped them to myself. I also picked out some rings and pins and a necklace from her collection that I remember her wearing. I'll have these things forever and to pass on some day to my kids. I'm so glad my brother came with me. My family was glad to see him again. Oh...we got to go into the city...went to John's Pizza in midtown manhatten...near my uncle's job: Sam Ash. Walked to the Rockefeller Center and saw the ice skaters and passed Time Square. Next time we'll have to take him everywhere else.

Safe and soundly we made it back home. Landed on time despite a turbulent ride back to CO. At least the flight wasn't full and I got to lay down across 3 seats and try to sleep. Judah drove us back to Loveland and then I drove home to Ft.Collins. I didn't get home till 3p and probably not to sleep till 3:30. I had work today from 9-1:30, went shopping, cleaned my moldy fridge, cleaned the kitchen, swept the house, started laundry, and now I'm babysitting Maddie! I think I'll go to bed early! Especially since I've got work at 7am tomorrow at the daycare. Craziness.

YAY!!!! My Deborah is coming out to CO from May 1st-14th!!!! Adrian better come within that time frame...hehe. Barry's excited too...even though I think it would be fun to have everyone in the birthing room and all...I think we're just going to have Deborah...really I think that all I need is Barry and for someone to support him BUT I think that too many people might not be helpful...and I want him to feel in charge of helping me and not feel that someone else can do what he needs to do....So we're thinking just Deborah and him in the room for now.

NJ

Judah and I are in NJ now!!! Our flight was delayed 1/2 hr but went fast and smoothly! Did you know Frontier offers DirectTV for $5 and movies for $8? I think that's cool but i didn't get anything on the way here...slept instead and read my magazine.
Friday we got in...Saturday we hung out at my Aunt Sharon's with Eric and Justin, our cousins. She took me shopping and to visit with my grandfather...then we headed to my Aunt Ann's and cousin Lauren's. Spent the night and hung out. Today we are going back to my Aunt Sharon's and having a big family dinner...all the inlaws are coming too!!! Hopefully my friends will call and I'll get to see them before I leave.
I can't believe I'm here...I miss it and especially all my family. It's kind of rainy and gloomy today but the weather was awesome yesterday.

32 Weeks Today! Start of 8th Month!

I had the interview yesterday morning at 9am before work. I think it went well!! They are still interviewing into next week but will call next week and let me know if they have more questions or if they have made a decision!! I dropped all the names I knew and I'm pretty confident that I will at least be considered among the others.

I am packing today...finally...I usually start packing a week in advance. I've been so worn out and busy though that I haven't. I guess I won't forget anything but I'm always worried that I will. I never do though. Still don't know about the ride situation....Julie might take us there and Judah's friend might pick us up. I don't know if I can handle an hour ride in a car where people smoke and use the ashtray though. Especially after traveling on an airplane and it being midnight by the time we get in. It might make me sick. The other option is driving and parking...only $5 a night so not too expensive. However...do I want to drive at midnight?

I have a training for work tonight. It's called Connecting the Dots: Teacher Training regarding Sensory Integration In the Classroom!! I love class! I miss school sometimes. Yes..I know..I'm a dork.

What do you think of the baby room art I made? Babies focus on black and white contrast so I was thinking of hanging this above the changing table or crib (once we move and Adrian has a room). Also thinking of doing two more canvases in black on white and white on black to make a checkerboard hanging.

So...a federal court ruling on Autism and Vaccinations has made it seem like the gov't has finally owned up (at least in this case) to a possible link b/n the poisons in the vaccines and an effect on health. I know they've taken the mercury out of vaccines in 2001 (except the flu vaccine btw) but there is still other poisonous metals like aluminum in them. I have yet to fully research the matter but why inject poisons and diseases into your child? So far it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me...especially when there is widespread suspicion of the safety of the vaccines. BTW...I wasn't vaccinated until 6th grade and I even dealt with German measles. I was never sick even when I was around everyone who was. I ate healthy and played outside everyday. I went to bed early and got enough sleep and never ate junk food. I was exposed to germs and dirt wasn't yucky...animals were meant to be pet, even the farm kind...I get sick less than anyone I know and I've never taken antibiotics. The 6 years that I smoked cigarettes were my most unhealthy years ever...I could feel my body fighting me and I got sick every winter...I developed allergies...and felt tired all the time. I think that if you eat healthy and exercise everyday...your body will protect you. However if you weaken your body then it is harder to fight off diseases and infections....and you get tossed into a pattern of needing the medical system to help you do what your body was intended to do naturally. My body has never failed me. I know there are exceptions...and I know that everyone is different...and I know that everyone has an opinion but this is mine...

So Ronnie might come out in May!!! My dad and Deborah may or may not come out in mid-July. We'll be moved by June so if anyone wants to stay we'll have a spare room...we're taking reservations...hehehe....Also we're thinking of going to Maui at Christmastime this year!

Adrian Update: So the wiggling and rolling hasn't stopped yet...however, he is running out of space to wiggle and roll and my poor stomach is sore from his workout! He woke me up the last couple nights, his movement was so intense. As we speak he's pushing out on my belly...I think he's rebelling against the cramped quarters. Oh...and the cramping (Braxton-Hicks practice contractions) have become a routine and more intense feeling. Around dinner time my stomach gets tight like a hard ball. It doesn't so much hurt as feel extremely uncomfortable and tiring.

Barry taught me how to play Cribbage! He won last night but I was close.

I have to go make the baby shower invitation list now! My cousin Christie wants it before she goes to Italy!!! I know some people can't come but I want you to know if you lived here...I'd want you to come!

Childbirth Classes

Barry and I started our Childbirth (through Foothills Childbirth Education Association) classes last night. We missed the 1st class b/c we signed up too late and we're missing the 3rd since I'll be in Jersey, but Becky will make it up with us on a Saturday. Also a couple of the classes are on a Tue which means I'll have to go alone on one of them since B has dart league and it just so happens that it's position night! It lasted from 7-9...which after being out of school for a year now shows me how out of shape I am for sitting still for 2 hours. Of course having to pee every 15 minutes doesn't help either...although I wasn't the only one. Funny Adrian decided class time while the teacher discussed signs of labor, labor and it's stages and phases, breathing which we got to practice, and massage (YES! we got to practice this one too), would be the perfect time to wiggle, jiggle, jump, and roll! Maybe the other babies so near in proximity were exciting and communicating! Actually...that would be creepy....All in all it was long but good refresher of info (yes...I've had this before considering my degree is directly related to children and development over the lifespan) ...AND bonus: Barry didn't fall asleep!

Still working on my to-do list today! I got a call back for an interview for the Case Aide P/T position in Larimer County Human Services that I applied for.

31 Weeks Picture

WOW! Adrian has been moving sooooo much! I tried to get it on video BUT he only moves when the video camera is off or out of bateries...how on earth does he know? Seriously! It's kind of annoying. Right now...he's wiggling ALL over the place but the battery is charging. He's pushing on me so hard it kind of hurts.

I'm happy it's friday! I worked from 6:30 to 5:30 again today...nine hours not including breaks but that still makes a very long day! All week has been full of these long days. Anyways...I have a huge to-do list for the weekend but I only work tomorrow evening, babysitting for a fun little one-year old!

Yay! My cousin is 12 weeks pregnant! I'm so excited that our kids will be close together.

Lots to do before we leave for NJ next Friday. 1st on the list...get some sleep!

31 Weeks...63 Days Left

I don't think I've gotten anything done on my to do list...I've been working 9-11 hours every day this week! It's craziness so when I get home I just crash (sorry I haven't called or emailed anyone lately...such a slacker). This morning I'm trying to catch up on housework b/c it looks like a hurricane hit the office...there is no more floor space. Yes it is embarrassing but it happens to everyone sometimes. At least my clean clothes are still seperated from the dirty ones.

To add to the to do list:
bills
taxes
clean house
go to Siobhan and Ryan's baby shower for Connor at end of month!!!!
write out birth plan
go to childbirth classes on Mondays for next 6 weeks!!
go to Gavin's 1 year b-day party
keep working like a mad woman

Anyway...this morning I'm eating some lovely oatmeal with bananas, walnuts, and brown sugar...however...it is quite banana-y...I should have used less.

Adrian has been moving for the last week straight....He's so active...I never expected this. It's pretty fun to watch and feel the show though. His kicks are no longer kicks or as jabby (maybe no more room to pull back and put the force into it) but leg/knee/elbow/hand rolls across my belly. He sticks his head and butt out and practices walking against my hips. He still seems to have enough room to manuever into all sorts of positions. Sometimes I worry that he's going to knot his umbilical cord. I guess that's very rare though. I've been getting more growing/stretching pains...feels like a pulled muscle in the bottom of my stomach and I can't move until it goes away...usually a minute or three. Also I can feel mild cramping in my stomach, assuming those are Braxton Hick's contractions when I rest in the evening. I've been feeling them since week 20, sporadically, and I guess they start happening at around week 6. Supposed to be getting stronger as the third trimester moves along. Usually people don't feel them until last trimester anyway.

I signed Barry and I up for childbirth classes through Foothills Childbirth Education Association!!! We'll go on mondays from 7-9p and they last 7 weeks. We missed the 1st class of this series but the instructor will bring us up-to-date. Then after all the babies from the class are born....we'll meet for 4 weeks post-partum and get to bring the babies!

My cousins and friend are throwing me a baby shower in April! I'm so excited! I'll big and rolly-polly by then. Yay!

Doggy Update: Sasha hasn't had an accident or an on-purpose in the house in two straight days, and never in her kennel. Hurray! We've been putting her to bed in the kennel and at 2-ish she wakes up and we let her out and then let her come sleep with us. Then at 5-ish she wakes or when B gets up at 6:30. He lets them out while he showers and then back in. I wake at 8-9ish to let them out. When we're gone all day...Harley is inside and Sasha in the kennel. If it's nice enough out...they stay outside and play. When we're home...they wrestle and play inside. They are getting along well. I worry when Harley gets jealous and won't let Sasha eat, he growls and eats all the food....just have to watch them and give him extra attention and keep him away from her when she eats. That's been working. They are such strange breeds...they take a bite of food and bring it to the living room to eat it. I've see other cattle dogs do that also.

30 Weeks

Yesterday my cousin Julie and I had the day off so we decided to clean our houses, then hang out. We went swimming at the Loveland rec center where the water was wonderfully warm. Adrian liked that. He was kicking and rearranging himself in weird positions while we swam back and forth for about 1/2 an hour. Then we sat in the hot tub for a little while...mostly dipping our legs in and sitting on the steps. After swimming we ate some girl scout cookies and went shopping for dinner. We made Elk Spinach Lasagna and Chicken Enchiladas. Yum. I took some over to Grandma Kay and Grandpa since they got back from the hospital yesterday. Grandma Kay's surgery went well and she looked great!

Mr. Adrian hasn't stopped moving ALL day! He was awake way before me and has been kicking ever since. The water in the shower used to lull him to sleep but not even that worked today...maybe he's learning night from day. HEHE...probably not since that doesn't register until a couple of months. Maybe he's stretching and trying to expand his living space. It feels pretty cramped right now to me. Lets just hope it doesn't happen too fast or I'll get stretch marks and so far so good.

Today I'm off unless I get called in to sub at the daycare. All I have to do is babysit Madi this evening. Julie is bringing Ringo down to FC after work and we're going to take the dogs to the new horsetooth dog park! Sasha can't go in yet since she doesn't have all her shots but she can come with us for the outing.

I have such a long To Do List:

scrapbook (that's a fun one)
reapply for medicaid/update cicp status
clean house...neverending
organize all my papers/office/filing cabinet
pay bills
apply for teaching license
grow wiggly baby
pack unecessary things/find place to store them
organize/pack shed
get barry to clean back yard
clean car/get oil change
get hair cut before nj?
pack for nj
go through bucket of toys
wash all baby stuff

What A Day

Wow...What a day! I'm so glad it's coming to an end.

First of all...I found out that my substitute license expired. I got it last May and was under the impression that it lasted a year. Obviously it ended about 3 days ago and was not in fact a year long license. I feel bad since I was intending to sub next Friday and ...for the rest of the school year. You may ask why I don't have my permanant teaching license and that is because I'm a slacker and thought that this one would last for a year...and since getting pregnant I was not intending to take a position immediately. My goal is to get that paperwork together by mid-March.

Second of all...I stress about silly things...like getting plane tickets. I had to find plane tickets to NJ for my brother and myself. We are flying back to see family in March. Friday March 14th until Tuesday March 18th. I found a pretty good deal...every website I checked had the same deal btw...no use browsing between travelocity/orbitz/cheaptickets/american airlines/frontier/priceline/etc...I seriously checked them all. The same flight numbers and deals were offered on all sites. Why are there so many if they're all the same? Anyways...Our grandmother died and we have to sign some paperwork and whatnot. My uncle also died shortly after. I am glad that we'll get to see our family. We never flew out for either funeral and haven't seen our family since past summer at the wedding. Both Judah and I are excited to see the family. Also they will get to see me with my big old belly...that'll be fun! Sad but exciting. I don't think I really believe my grandmother and uncle won't be there till I see it though. It's hard to accept being so far away.
**And yes...I'm okay to fly! The only airline that had any limitations (for domestic) was american airlines and you can't fly the week before or after your due date. A note is helpful if flying within a month of the due date. I'll bring a note anyway but Frontier rules said that my doctor and I know best and there are no limitations!

Then on my way to my first job: a couple of sub hours at the daycare, I bumped into someone else's car...with my car. There was no visible damage. I was shooken up though. I can't believe I did that. I thought they had pulled into traffic and I scooted up. They were still there. I had my seatbelt on and the woman wasn't too concerned about a little dent that might have been from my car.
Then I went to my second job. I babysit a little boy named Gavin! We had fun together.
Then on to my third job: babysitting Madison. I had to pick her up from a friend's friend's house and bring her to my house where she'll spend the night tonight. Her mother is going out for her birthday! I'll just drop her at daycare in the morning before I head to my daycare for the entire day. My next door neighbor, Nya (6), and Madison and I took Harley and Sasha to the park for a walk and to play. Then the girls watched PowerPuff Girls and we had tuna sandwiches, broccoli and ranch for dinner. Now Madi is taking a bath and bedtime will be around 8.

I am so ready for bed myself. I was ready for bed this morning at 9 when I woke up as a matter of fact. Hopefully tomorrow will be easier!